Sunday Morning - Maroon 5
Sunday morning rain is fallingSteal some covers share some skinClouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettableYou twist to fit the mold that I am inBut things just get so crazy living life gets hard to doAnd I would gladly hit the road get up and go if I knewThat someday it would lead me back to youThat someday it would lead me back to youThat may be all I needIn darkness (s)he is all I seeCome and rest your bones with meDriving slow on Sunday morningAnd I never want to leaveFingers trace your every outlinePaint a picture with my handsBack and forth we sway like branches in a stormChange the weather still together when it endsThat may be all I needIn darkness (s)he is all I seeCome and rest your bones with meDriving slow on Sunday morningAnd I never want to leaveBut things just get so crazy living life gets hard to doSunday morning rain is falling and I'm calling out to youSinging someday it'll bring me back to youFind a way to bring myself home to youAnd you may not knowThat may be all I needIn darkness (s)he is all I seeCome and rest your bones with meDriving slow?

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listening to that song over and over again may be sickening, but i can't help but do it.
last night, err this morning, i had the stupidest yet at the same time most serious conversationg with ez. it was like all of a sudden i couldn't take it anymore. keeping all this to myself. i couldn't.
for about an hour i told ez all about someone.. *sigh* how much i miss that person and how i realized that no matter what shit he does to me and how much i should be hating him, i still love him. and that's what makes it hard to get over him.

for crying out loud, i don't even talk to him anymore. so why do i still feel this way? maybe part of me still wants to think that he's still his old self and that he hasn't changed. or maybe i'm wishing that he will change and this time he would be this person who's even more amazing than when i knew him, once.

i'm not making any sense now am i?

see how serious and stupid that conversation was? serious because i was reminiscing on the days we would still talk about almost everything and anything. about the time that i was actually happy just being his friend, though i knew he liked someone else. i had realizations. realizations that got me thinking. that got me crying. they were stupid because i knew what i wanted would never come. never.

but was i really, err, am i really still in love with you? i mean, thinking about the past, what the hell did i see in you that i didn't see in anyone else? there was just really something about you that hit me. something i can't explain.

then i realized something again. i realized that it's not the ass that i don't want to get into relationships. it's because i keep on comparing all the other guys to you. and as much as i'd want to get over you, i can't. i don't know why. like you would say, "malakas yung tama" ko.
but it's only by getting over you that i can move on. have you moved on? hell, did you have something to move on for? to get over? i doubt it. unrequitted love this time of month once again.

so i stick to that. if i can't get over you, i'll wait. it's been a year of waiting and nothing's happened. but i can still wait some more. i still do very much love you. you're old you atleast. and if nothing happens between us, i won't mind. i'll be happy as long as you're happy.

di na tayo katulad ng dati, kay bilis ng sandali.. o kay tagal din kitang mamahalin..